Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Random Jesus Things

Jesus is a big deal in the South. Maybe he's a big deal in lots of places - but he's a big deal in weird ways around here. VBGF's mother (in the Appalachians) has these slippers delicately placed beside her bed - but she has them positioned like ballet slippers perpendicular to one another. I don't think she's ever actually worn them.

This weekend, at the wedding in Philly, we were comparing notes with a woman (named Hannah) from western North Carolina about regional expressions. The old standards came up: my (very Southern sounding) sister who can make the word 'hey' have more syllables than letters and Hannah's being accused of always 'fixin' something. But then Hannah came up with one I've never heard of. A common expression in her hometown (apparently) is "my hair is dirty, my feet stink, but I do love Jesus." I had never heard this - ever. I googled it and the closest hits I got were all from or about Jimmy Buffet's song. But then there was this reference which was also close and said it was a North Carolina expression. I dunno. Do you?

A bank near me once had a bobble-head Jesus at one of the teller windows - but it wasn't there when I went back to take a picture of it. (The teller was AARP aged and sincere - if slow as molasses as a teller. I don't think she had it as a joke - but maybe the bank made her take it down in case someone took it the wrong way.)

And (last two things) there's this website - which I don't quite get. And this one - which I don't get at all. Those aren't Southern - they're just miscellaneous Jesus things I found while trying to find the origins of 'my hair is dirty, my feet stink, but I do love Jesus'. Clearly a lot of work went into those websites. But why?

From there to here and here to there; Jesus things are everywhere!

Bonus feature in the form of advice: whatever you do - do NOT google the word "Jesus" with any food item. I do not want to admit how many hours I spent trying to find a food that had not at some time in some place borne the face of Jesus. Aspargus, tortillas, grilled cheese, radishes, fish sticks, peach pits - the list goes on and on!!

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